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| LTR goes friend zone (know why).What to do next? https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=126392 |
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| Author: | skyy7 [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 8:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | LTR goes friend zone (know why).What to do next? |
Let's keep it short. In a LTR for two years. After a year attraction started slowly to fade. I moved to a new city which is closer to her & my work so I didn't really had a big social circle around me anymore. We hung out too much. I was not drawing my frame enough anymore. I was simply showing a lower value. I'm fully aware of everything that went wrong. I tried to talk with her but she was not ready to understand and I was blind to realize what was going on. After one and a half year I tried again to talk to her, but she simply said 'I love you so much! It's not a problem for me either.' She now realized the whole situation and we got to the point where we said that we need to get space and calm things down. She broke out in tears because she can not explain herself what happened and why we lost the sexual attraction. She told me, that she doesn't want to loose me and that she loves me but she need to sort her thoughts and she doesn't know what to do. She is under high pressure at her job at the moment which doesn't make things easier. Some days ago we didn't text for some days. She already called me the evening and told me that she misses me and can't sleep. When I saw her she told me that she really missed me a lot! I felt that a bit of attraction came back very fast because we usually text/phone every day. I can see all what went wrong, like focusing too much on my career and having no social life anymore, being too much available etc. I'm not sure what to do next. I'll focus on my life, work out a lot, try to create a larger social life... I'll give her a lot of space and will be unavailable to do my thing. Any inputs welcome. |
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| Author: | skyy7 [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 9:30 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
any comments would be welcome |
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| Author: | Richard Pryor [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 9:42 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Well, you finally go enough posts to start your own thread, so no more bumping old topics I hope. Quote: and we got to the point where we said that we need to get space and calm things down.
There's no "we" in these type of situations. It was either you or her that came to that conclusion. "We broke up" either means "I left her" or "she left me".I'm guessing she left you since you're asking for advice. You seem to know exactly what went wrong and what you need to do. Make a conscious effort to move on. That's the only way you'll get her back. Work out, look better, be successful, go out, try to sleep with other women, try to forget about her. I'd also try to read a thread on here http://heartiste.wordpress.com/ titled "how to get back with your ex girlfriend" or something like that. Basically tells you what to do step by step. Very useful. |
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| Author: | skyy7 [ Fri Jan 20, 2012 9:59 pm ] |
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Quote:
There's no "we" in these type of situations. It was either you or her that came to that conclusion.
What I meant I came to that conclusion but we both agreed.And no, she didn't leave me. There's simply some space where each of us organize his thoughts and take some time to re-think. To be honest. I'm asking for advice because I've seen exactly what went wrong and simply think of it as a valuable relationship which I would like to keep/transform again. Thanks for the link. Couldn't find an article with this title. If I start to work out more etc (I already do 3-4 times a week) she'll probably think I'll try to impress her. |
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| Author: | Wolfwoodd [ Mon Jan 23, 2012 4:09 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Well, you finally go enough posts to start your own thread, so no more bumping old topics I hope.
Huh, so THAT'S why all the newbies bump old posts with inane comments.. Now I kinda feel bad for taking away points from Mattyman. I didn't know that.Quote: and we got to the point where we said that we need to get space and calm things down.
There's no "we" in these type of situations. It was either you or her that came to that conclusion. "We broke up" either means "I left her" or "she left me".I'm guessing she left you since you're asking for advice. You seem to know exactly what went wrong and what you need to do. Make a conscious effort to move on. That's the only way you'll get her back. Work out, look better, be successful, go out, try to sleep with other women, try to forget about her. I'd also try to read a thread on here http://heartiste.wordpress.com/ titled "how to get back with your ex girlfriend" or something like that. Basically tells you what to do step by step. Very useful. Skyy, it's possible that this relationship just ran it's course. The attraction endorphins that you get with a newer relationship only last so long (usually 2-3 years). That's when most relationships tend to end (if the couple doesn't get married or have kids). My advice is simple. Take a break from this girl, get your alpha mind-set back and meet some women. If you really want this girl back, then you can always re-initiate contact with her after you get your head on straight and your social life in order. -Wolf |
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