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Becoming the ( Challange ) In a long relationship
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Author:  Ap [ Wed Dec 28, 2011 4:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Becoming the ( Challange ) In a long relationship

It's a short straight to the point post.

I've been reading a lot lately about people becoming complacent in relationships. I wanted to know what is the best way to become a Challenge I think I may be loosing this battle. I am still confident in all aspects other than this which I think is one of the most important aspects. I hope some intresting points of view get posted I need one that would suit me. I don't want to go out and make her jealous because I know I'd get the wrong reaction from her because she knows I'm the flirty type anyway I think that's what gets her going. But I needed more diffrent unique ways.

Author:  Snake Doctor [ Wed Dec 28, 2011 6:34 pm ]
Post subject: 

Being a challenge in relantioship.

She is not your priority in life, your objective in life comes first.

Not being too avaiable or needy. Like I said she is not priority.

Dont spend too much time together. Quality is better than quantity.

Being the man. And yes being flirty with people, She needs to feel there are other females in the area ready to attack if you and her have any problem. If she feels this she is not going to let have time to mope around other females.

Dont give in too her crazyiness, or even apologize just to end argument. If you think you are right and she is not, freeze her out or something.

Have a hobby! Mine is making friendship bracelets lol.

And ofcourse the famous licking the asshole of your women.

Author:  papichulo818 [ Wed Dec 28, 2011 6:55 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Being a challenge in relantioship.

She is not your priority in life, your objective in life comes first.

Not being too avaiable or needy. Like I said she is not priority.

I'd rephrase this as "she's A PRIORITY, but not your single, linear focus - have other things going on in your life. Always strive to become a better man, a better person - this does not begin and end with her"

Dont spend too much time together. Quality is better than quantity.

Spend as much time as you feel there's a strong pair bond between you. Have a life outside of her - in other words, don't feel the need to include her in every aspect of your life. Have a few things reserved for yourself

Being the man. And yes being flirty with people, She needs to feel there are other females in the area ready to attack if you and her have any problem. If she feels this she is not going to let have time to mope around other females.

Flirting in front of your woman can be a massive turnoff and in fact make her stray. I wouldn't do this under any circumstance. Engage other people, but flirting is a big no no, she'll eventually think you're playing games and leave. It's one thing for your woman to see you're a desirable male, and another entirely to insult her by flirting with others in front of her.

Dont give in too her crazyiness, or even apologize just to end argument. If you think you are right and she is not, freeze her out or something.

If you think you are right, you may lose all objectivity in the relationship and simply come off as stubborn and non compromising which is unattractive to most secure women. I think some guys take this whole alpha thing a bit too far and come off as dicks to their gf's then end up coming on here making threads on how to avoid getting dumped.


Have a hobby! Mine is making friendship bracelets lol.

And ofcourse the famous licking the asshole of your women.

Lots of women love this; it can be quite kinky and stimulating for them too!;p

Author:  papichulo818 [ Wed Dec 28, 2011 6:56 pm ]
Post subject: 

Think of being unpredictable (in a good way) as a synonym for challenging, in this case.

Author:  Wolfwoodd [ Wed Dec 28, 2011 8:53 pm ]
Post subject: 

I agree with SOME of what's been said in this thread:

The main idea in this thread is to not become a beta-male. Once a woman has betaized you, then you are no longer a challenge. You are a safe, pussy-whipped provider.

To stay a challenge, stay alpha..

- Don't fail shit tests
- Don't become needy
- Don't reward bad behavior
- Don't be an AFC

-Wolf

Author:  Ap [ Thu Dec 29, 2011 8:57 am ]
Post subject: 

Thanks for the replies guys.

I need to have a way to balance this out, like how much should I go out, How many days should I see her because we see each other usually 4/5 days a week. I talked to her last night about how everything was a routine and I wasn't really happy. She said routine is good which I was quite shocked at because It's not good and I don't like it. I don't want routine she can be quite lazy and I need to stop this shit.

Author:  papichulo818 [ Thu Dec 29, 2011 9:51 am ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Thanks for the replies guys.

I need to have a way to balance this out, like how much should I go out, How many days should I see her because we see each other usually 4/5 days a week. I talked to her last night about how everything was a routine and I wasn't really happy. She said routine is good which I was quite shocked at because It's not good and I don't like it. I don't want routine she can be quite lazy and I need to stop this shit.
Why are you trying to quantify everything? Answer: because you're way too invested in this and therefore overly consumed with the prospect of screwing up (losing her).

I'm not going to sit here and enable this sort of thinking. You're asking the wrong question(s). Instead, your question should be "how can I start getting back my sense of self, and improving myself?"

Whatever question you ask, your brain will work toward finding an answer. Ask it a bad question, you'll invariably get bad answers (e.g. "Why am I such a failure at relationships?", rather than "what is it that I can take from this experience and use to grow for the future?").

Think hard about the questions you should be asking yourself.

Author:  Wolfwoodd [ Thu Dec 29, 2011 6:42 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
Thanks for the replies guys.

I need to have a way to balance this out, like how much should I go out, How many days should I see her because we see each other usually 4/5 days a week. I talked to her last night about how everything was a routine and I wasn't really happy. She said routine is good which I was quite shocked at because It's not good and I don't like it. I don't want routine she can be quite lazy and I need to stop this shit.
It sounds to me like you aren't leading the relationship very well. Man up and take some responsibility! Go out when you feel like going out. See her when you're horny. If you don't like routine, then do something different. If she's feeling lazy, then let her be lazy while you do your own thing.

I agree with Papi, you are looking at this from the wrong angle.

-Wolf

Author:  Ap [ Fri Dec 30, 2011 8:54 am ]
Post subject: 

I think you are right I'm not leading this relationship, I am happy with her and I don't think we are even close to finishing but... I do want things to change and I do want to become the challange I was at the start. I agree with what you guys say but after work and football/gym I'm soo tired I just want to chill out watch a dvd with her so it's hard sometimes to go off and do my own thing.

Author:  Optimo [ Tue Jan 10, 2012 6:36 am ]
Post subject:  I Broke The Rules

I decided to post in this thread after lurking for a bit because this question is along the lines of what brought me here.

I screwed up.. (we're still together)
But I screwed up in the following ways:

1.) I went and told her I loved her first.

2.) I lost my cool over her relationship with a guy friend. I left her place, and she later told me that she'll cut off the guy friends to make me happy.

Today, a month later she tells me she can't cut off her guy friends.
Doesn't want me to go, or be upset but she just cant do it.

I told her to do what she wants, I'm not going to tell her what to do or what not to do.
I told her to do her thing, and I'd do mine.

The rest of the night I was short in my texts to her, not overly quiet but just not talkative.

What do? ?

Please help.

Author:  SmoothOp [ Tue Jan 10, 2012 4:05 pm ]
Post subject: 

I think the portuguese snake docter is right on. Only thing I also disagree on is you should prioritize her if you are in a long term relationship, just have your own PERSONAL goals that you work hard for aswell.

Also I think minor flirting with women infront of your GF works wonders, (If she has a lot of trust), basically makes her sexually attracted to you.

Relationships become boring and tedious. People do aswell. I suggest you sit down and write a list of things you want to accomplish in 2012 (includes things to do with your partner) Example: Scuba Diving, Travel to France, Desert Snowboarding, drink 100 types of different beers, ect... Get your GFs input on the list. This will spice up your life and spice up hers.

I think from a women's view of relationship she wants:
1) To feel safe and be taken care of (leading, inatiative, active listening)
2) Be sexually attracted to you (see above^, have goals, confidence, improve your body and mind)
3) Able to feel like a young girl (have fun, be spontaneous, laugh, pranks)

If you can do these things aswell as maintian a strong character as others mentioned, you be be golden.

- Don't apologize to avoid fights, stand your ground, when she is wrong she is wrong
- When she tries to push your buttons, do the opposit of what she expects "predictability is the enemy of interesting"
- Express your manliness on her (bedroom)

I agree with everyone btw, I just felt like expressing my thoughts because I am in the same situation.

Author:  40 year old virgins broth [ Wed Jan 11, 2012 12:08 am ]
Post subject: 

Problem is, u used PU artistry to get her, if she goes out without u, somebody else
might game her and she will fall for it again, since all this stuff works right?

Author:  Optimo [ Wed Jan 11, 2012 12:40 am ]
Post subject: 

Any advice for me?

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