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| Advice needed with GF https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=128&t=101160 |
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| Author: | 2a0j1w1 [ Fri Sep 09, 2011 8:59 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Advice needed with GF |
I've been in a 7 month relationship (not sure if thats considered LTR or not) that has recently come to a turning point: college. And college in states about 2000 miles apart. My GF says she doesn't know if her feelings are the same now and I know its only because of the physical distance. She even told me the same thing about a month before we left for school but quickly came back around and said it was just her way of trying to cope with the upcoming separation. I'm really confused as of what to do, I know she's still going to try and talk to me and would extremely jealous if I was with another girl. I love her dearly but I'm also not sure if putting up with this is better or a sign of weakness. |
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| Author: | nomen [ Sat Sep 10, 2011 3:28 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
It doesn't matter if it is a sign of weakness. This is between you and her. I don't see how it will work though, unless you have an open relationship. Your going to college, you barely even have to game freshman. |
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| Author: | 2a0j1w1 [ Sun Sep 11, 2011 2:05 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: It doesn't matter if it is a sign of weakness. This is between you and her. I don't see how it will work though, unless you have an open relationship. Your going to college, you barely even have to game freshman.
The relationship is open while were at school yes, we both agreed that was the only realistic approach. I guess I'm primarily concerned with keeping her attracted to me and wanting me while were apart.
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| Author: | heno 007 [ Sun Sep 11, 2011 4:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Looking at this situation from a totally emotionally unattached perspective I would tell you to get out of the relationship. You wont be seeing her for periods of up to six months and you both will likely want to get with other people. You should have ended it in your town on a good note so you could have preserved something for the future. if you aren't concerned about that: keeping her interested is easy in an LDR (ive been in one for 7months 150kms away) The golden goal is to keep her missing you- Make sure you keep in contact, call her a few times per week to check how she is going, text her, arrange SPAM dates and try to see her in person as much as possible but always remain a little out of reach. A LDR makes you more appealing to the other person since you are out of reach. |
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| Author: | 2a0j1w1 [ Sun Sep 11, 2011 8:40 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks Heno, we did leave on a good note actually our last 3 weeks together were great..good advice on the "keep her missing me". Any way to game her from a distance from time to time? Should I make it a point to tell her other girls are interested in me? Another question..should I avoid checking her Facebook page and Twitter? I don't wanna end up putting too much attention into her I know that isn't good. |
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| Author: | heno 007 [ Mon Sep 12, 2011 12:56 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
you probably want to limit jealousy as it will be amplified in a LDR. This will create trust issues and pretty much destroy the relationship. For the FB and twitter page, you don't want to end up being naive in a LDR. Im not saying you should check her personal information but you should be mindful of what is going on. You have to almost accept the fact you are going to get burnt and not care that it happens. if she starts being cold, rejects your calls, doesn't want to include you in her family life/shows a general disinterest in you chances are shes feeling guilty and has cheated on you. she will be less likely to cheat if she is attracted to you. |
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| Author: | 2a0j1w1 [ Mon Sep 12, 2011 1:38 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: you probably want to limit jealousy as it will be amplified in a LDR. This will create trust issues and pretty much destroy the relationship.
Alright. We've built up a lot of trust and she tells me everything (including a guy that tried to get on her already) but we're not technically together for that very reason..if one of us ends up hooking up with another person we don't wanna have to feel like its cheating, although it might feel that way. On the Facebook/twitter: twitter is just pointless stuff about her day and Facebook she uploads pics and thats about it. I just don't want to look too much cause it'll make me miss her more.
For the FB and twitter page, you don't want to end up being naive in a LDR. Im not saying you should check her personal information but you should be mindful of what is going on. You have to almost accept the fact you are going to get burnt and not care that it happens. if she starts being cold, rejects your calls, doesn't want to include you in her family life/shows a general disinterest in you chances are shes feeling guilty and has cheated on you. she will be less likely to cheat if she is attracted to you. |
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| Author: | heno 007 [ Mon Sep 12, 2011 1:58 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
If you aren't concerned about whether she is cheating then all you have to do is keep her attracted. You can do that by keeping an emotional connection and making her love you. You make her love you indirectly by keeping a little out of reach and DHVing (demonstrating that you are a high value individual). DHV include remaining busy, having a healthy lifestyle, having success in any field, being self confident, being preselected by women, being social. try to be alpha and you will DHV automatically. |
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| Author: | BigRyana [ Mon Sep 12, 2011 2:37 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
You are essentially waiting to get hurt, or hurt her. I speak from experience, and being in this exact situation in the past. College is an amazing time, and you don't want to waste it worrying about what a girl thousands of miles away might think if you hook up with another girl. I don't believe in "open" relationships, you are either together, or you are casually dating, but you can't go backwards. And you can't casually date from thousands of miles away, so you have to let go. You can end it amicably or wait until a situation arises, but it will happen eventually. That is the bad news. The good news is you're at college, there are tons of hot, curious girls all over. Live it up man. If you try to hold on you will end up regretting it. |
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| Author: | 2a0j1w1 [ Mon Sep 12, 2011 5:14 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for the advice guys, appreciate it. I've been going back and forth myself and I'm still gonna stay in touch and try to keep her attracted but I'm not gonna let her hold me back. |
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| Author: | themodernfemme [ Mon Sep 12, 2011 7:46 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Before the first to end the relationship |
Before the first to end the relationship and find another girlfriend! |
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