Welcome dude. Ditch the AFC label now. You're beyond that because you're improving yourself
Quote:
I never touched her.
Work on this. A girl who's into you may feel you're not into her if you keep your hands to yourself.
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| Just learned what I'm called, an AFC https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=192319 |
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| Author: | bigiddybg [ Fri Aug 21, 2015 7:29 am ] |
| Post subject: | Just learned what I'm called, an AFC |
I am 33 years old and, long story short, am incredibly insecure around women whom I find attractive. With the (somewhat implausible) goal of turning the tide on this insecurity and experiencing success with women I have recently been doing some research online to try and find ways to work on improving this aspect of myself. Said search has lead me to David Wygant's site, purchasing a copy of 'The Game" (I just got it and am on page 50) and now reaching out to a PUA forum in conjunction with reading the book. I know myself - I would much prefer getting and offering support from other AFC's as I move forward with this process… since failure is a requisite for success I'll definitely thrive off of support from others. Just had a 1st date with a beautiful blonde on Wednesday night, we had spoken on the phone a handful of times leading up to our first date and all of those conversations went really well. She is easy to talk to, great/similar sense of humor, high energy and great outlook on life. She definitely seemed interested in me and upon reflection I can remember at least two IOI's; in fact at the end when I walked her to her car I was fairly certain that she wanted to kiss me but I ended with a hug instead. Before we parted I said this was fun and we should go out again to which she agreed… sorta gave herself an 'out' by saying she might have plans w/ her sister Friday. Called her yesterday (Thur) to ask her out on Fri but she said she decided to go out w/ her sister bc she hasn't seen her in a while (and apologized - ouch). Pretty sure this is an indication of a line gone cold and am considering giving up… and advice for next move? Any chance of recovery? I am disappointed but not ready to give up [on the whole 'getting better with women thing'] - just offering my most recent example. I critiqued myself afterwards: some highlights - 1. Was nervous waiting for her at the bar (I got there first and she was a few min late) and felt anxious sitting by myself; felt like the whole room could sense my anxiety. 2. Talked too much and didn't listen enough - didn't dig deeper and exhaust topics before moving on to a new one. 3. Cut her off sometimes when she said something relatable. 4. We used each others bar stool foot rests and she let her legs touch mine; she touched my leg several times with her hand. I never touched her. 5. I never made the conversation sexual. 6. Of course, the hug and not the kiss goodbye. I live just north of Baltimore, MD - just took a job that affords me nights and weekends off - would love to "sarge" w/ others and learn in the process. First question: you get to the meet spot first - do you go in? Wait outside? if you go in what's an alpha way to spend your time waiting? |
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| Author: | oceanx [ Fri Aug 21, 2015 3:52 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Just learned what I'm called, an AFC |
Welcome dude. Ditch the AFC label now. You're beyond that because you're improving yourself Quote: I never touched her.
Work on this. A girl who's into you may feel you're not into her if you keep your hands to yourself.
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| Author: | Eddie Fews [ Fri Aug 21, 2015 10:09 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Just learned what I'm called, an AFC |
Read this man: viewtopic.php?f=25&t=190620 No pain no gain. If you're new to this you're going to have to deal with a few painful experiences until you're actually ready to take it on. So if you felt ouch when in reference to the blonde, thats good. Its a signal that you now have a reason to grow. Welcome to the forum. If you have any direct questions just let me know. For you inside/outside question.. You have to set your own boundaries in life. Whats alpha is what you feel confident about doing. Following someone else model of what alpha is, is a beta. Betas follow the alphas. An alpha makes his own way. Peace bro. |
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| Author: | bigiddybg [ Fri Aug 21, 2015 11:42 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Just learned what I'm called, an AFC |
Thank you for replying to my post - and for your thought on the inside/outside thing. I know this is going to get worse before it gets better. Going out tonight with the goal of approaching, and will take the newbie mission #1 this weekend. I'm definitely going to keep posting questions and reflections b/c it makes me feel better and (now that I know someone's reading these) seems like a valid outlet for ideas and advice. Thanks again Eddie and OceanX |
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