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| Hi! I'm new! https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=160104 |
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| Author: | Telemachus2718 [ Tue Apr 09, 2013 9:39 am ] |
| Post subject: | Hi! I'm new! |
So, Hey Everyone! I'm Telemachus2718, and it says to introduce myself here, so that's what I'm doing. I'm a 20-something student from Los Angeles, a city full of beautiful and impressionable young women. I look pretty good on paper - I'm smart (And I'm not just saying that, I'm outside the testable range of a standard IQ battery acording to a major university, so my smarts may actually hurt my ability to socialize.); I have high income potential, slightly above average looks, a nice family, and an artistic side - I draw and paint. In skilled hands, these should be ingredients for a fun, desirable guy - but my hands are unskilled, and my interactions with women keep falling apart. I've read/watched various PUA-type things from time-to-time, between longer stretches of just getting fed up with female psychology, especially the way lying and manipulation are so ingrained that, from what I've read and in my limited experience, girls are truly unable to see how these are unethical behaviors - from the simple "sorry, I have a boyfriend," to the subtler games of varying response time and length to text messages. I want to be successful with women, and I'd like to do it without compromising my values and having to stoop to similar dishonesty. I want to learn to act in a way that is attractive, and maybe encourage the girls I meet to play a more sophisticated game as well. In terms of experience, I'm not bad at forming initial attraction, or even kiss/phone no. closes. In the early stages of meeting a girl, I'm more often a victim of my own MPB than any other failure. I've lived in LA long enough that I'm used to beautiful women and rarely feel intimidated by them. My real trouble comes in maintaining and building that initial attraction to turn a phone number into a date or a second date. I have lots of phone numbers and flirtacious text messages, even some naked pictures, but when I ask one of these girls out, I tend to get an "I need to see if I'm free." or similar. And really, I know that most 19 year old girls are not busy. They just aren't. Most recently, I went out a couple times with a girl who I thought was wonderful, LTR material, we had what I thought was a great rapport, texting and talking constantly all day, every day, for a few weeks. She even started going talking long-term stuff, taking me to meet her family and asking to meet mine, and then, suddenly, she stopped responding (this was pretty rough for me, since I was emotionally invested). I've been stuck in this pattern of seemingly intense attraction followed by apathy with little improvement for about two months of concerted effort, so it's time for some professional help. Some other things I need help with are: (1) Maintaining my stamina - I can turn on the charm when I'm in the mood, and it works pretty well, but if I've had a bad day, or I'm hungry, or I've just opened a couple sets in a row, or some other random thing, I can't keep up 100% focus anymore, and the conversation just dies. (2) Chick crack - girls love this stuff, but it turns me off so much that I lose focus and again, the conversation dies. The same goes for personality differences - she hates art, her favorite food is McNuggets, she smokes pot every day - things that would make her incompatible with me as a close friend or in a LTR, but are perfectly acceptible in a pick-up scenario - I can't seem to get past these distracting personality problems, even if I'm only looking for an occasional hookup. (3) LMR - This has been killing me since I was 15, and I was making out with a college girl on my bed, and somehow, it went no further. (4) Safety - Maybe I haven't looked hard enough, but I haven't found any good advice on dealing with the risks associated with meeting strangers in an adept PUA style. How can I make sure a girl doesn't have STDs or a risky Heroine habit or maybe lying about her age without destroying the rythm of a pattern, and preferably before I've had to shell out money and time going on a date with her or risk giving a crazy my phone number. This is even more difficult because so many girls feel the need to be "tricked" into having sex, so they can avoid the psychological pressure of choosing to have sex and seeing themselves as "slutty" - any explicit hint that sex is on the horizon, like asking about STDs, sends them running. Almost as frustrating are the girls who either don't know that they have an STD, or try to lie about an STD in order to remain attractive. (5) Inexperienced girls - What to do with them? I'd like to stay open to meeting a girl who really is special, and for me, since I'm naturally kinda quiet and conservative, this will probably be a girl who is less open to pick-up scenarios, who may out-of-hand ignore any attempt at a pick-up that doesn't involve copious amounts of sustained social contact - texting, talking, and other not overtly sexual activities which, from what I've seen, often symbolize emotional bonding for inexperienced girls. How do I go after a girl who doesn't respond to or isn't used to the high-efficiency, high-speed seduction techniques that are the focus of most PUAs, or who maybe isn't sure if she's ready for sex? (6) Emotional Connection - I meet lots of girls who I like, and who seem to like me, but I can't turn the initial feeling of finding each other interesting into a deeper connection or emotional rapport - the sort of thing that would make a girl want to incorporate me into her life, rather than view me as an expendable hookup. Anyway, I apologize for the length of this post, and I'm looking forward to really improving my social skills and doing much, much better with women, and in general social situations! Best, Telemachus |
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