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Help/Advice Needed - UK
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Author:  Palmer77 [ Mon Jun 04, 2012 6:15 pm ]
Post subject:  Help/Advice Needed - UK

Hi,

I'm a 25 year old male from Manchester, UK and to be honest I don't know how to talk to women at all. To be honest I think this has always been a problem as I went to an all boys school so never really got used to talking to girls at the age you should.

I've very rarely approached a girl day or night and just get stuck for things to say. After - Hi, ask name and ask how are they, my mind goes completly blank and I'm stuck for things to say which then leads to awkward silence which isn't very good. Once I get to know people I can talk away and make endless convo and make people laugh but with people I don't know and the main problem girls, my mind goes blank.

To be honest my confidence with women is quite low and can sometimes feel uncomfortable but if I actually knew what to say to bridge the gap with a girl so I could feel comfortable, confident and be myself that would help no end and would probably lesson the fear of approaching women.

I don't really know where to start with this problem but I'd love to solve it, not sure if there are places you can go or see in person but any help would be brilliant and sorry for the essay!

Thanks

Author:  brradd [ Mon Jun 04, 2012 8:27 pm ]
Post subject: 

There is obviously so much to cover and a single post cannot even begin to brush the surface on a question that is so broad and general. Its easy to say youre going to do something and it is completely different to have the balls to actually do it. With that said the only thing that will make you better with girls is field experience. Real circumstances and interactions with girls where you can fuck up, look back and see what you did wrong. You need real experiences that you can learn from.

Some really general advice (once again easier said than done). Show a girl that you are a fun guy to be around. Dont just focus on her. Focus on her friends and win them over. Focus on having a good time and being charismatic and outgoing. Make the girl work for your attention and make her feel happy and priveleged that she is interacting with you. Be confident and be in control. Woman can sense insecurity and they can sense desperation and it is super unattractive to them. Be congruent in your actions. Dont act a specific way and then all of a sudden change the way you are behaving, it will throw the girl off. Finally, Do not relate to girls as a stranger or co worker or a friend. Relate to them as a man to a woman.

I would also suggest doing some serious work on your inner game. This means analyzing how you think about yourself and how you think about woman and fixing the things you dont like. It is so easy to get stuck in a specific frame or to to be in a cognitive rut when viewing yourself. We all have something called a self concept, Which is by definition how we define ourselves through our personal qualities and things directly adjacent to us. How do you define yourself and are you happy with this definition?


Finally remember that there is no one liner or single stratagy that will get girl to like you. There is only field experience and the ability to convey the very best and most appealing person you can be. I hope you can take some useful information from this post and apply it to your life. Good luck and cheers.

-BRAD

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