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Completely failed day 1 exercise
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Author:  Bulletproof123 [ Mon Oct 03, 2011 5:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Completely failed day 1 exercise
Hey all,

Let me introduce myself. I'm bulletproof123, i'm 18 years old and living with my parents. I'm a fairly good looking guy from the Middle-East who has grown up in Holland. I'm currently going to college (6th form) in North London and will be going to uni next year. I am a rAFC hoping to become a pua. I have read "The Game" By Neil Strauss a couple of months ago and decided to check out this pua community. Since then I have been reading lots of books about pu including Magic Bullets, DiCarlo Escalation Ladder, 60 years of challenge, Daytime Dating and more.

However, only recently have I decided to go out and do something about my AA. So I purchased Demonic Confidence by Lucas West. So today I decided to go out and do the day 1 exercise. The exercise was basically go talk to 30 women and ask for the time. Just a simple "Hey excuse me, do you know what time it is?". Sounds simple.

However, I completely failed this and only asked 5 women (all ugly/old). The reason for that is because 4 out of 5 have given me less than warm reaction. They didn't stop at "excuse me" and looked as if they were ready to say something bitchy or tell me to fuck off. They did stop after I actually asked the question and they did answer me. But non of them even smiled or said anything after that they just wanted to get out and run away. But I didn't let it get to me, I didn't care much because they were complete strangers and didn't really want anything from them. I just want to get rid of my AA. The fifth women (UG4, late 30's) I asked her "Hey excuse me, do you know what time it is?" and then she just rolled her eyes and ignored me. After that I gave up because I got frustrated and I had to get back to college.

The whole day wasn't a complete fail though. When I got back I felt much more confident than I was before and didn't feel any anxiety. However, I still want to know what I did wrong, because my question was completely innocent and there was no way it looked like I was hitting on them (I wouldn't even want to). This exercise was supposed to show me how friendly and social strangers are and that there is nothing scary about approaching women. This exercise showed me the complete opposite of that.

So, what advice would you guys give me? I don't want to give up, but people aren't making it easy for me.

Anyways thank you for reading this and thank you to everyone in the community, you guys give guys like me hope.

P.S. Sorry for my English, it's not my native language.
Author:  Chai [ Mon Oct 03, 2011 6:39 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hey Bulletproof and welcome to the forum.

I've noticed that you've read quite a few books on pickup
yet you've only recently gone out there and actually
tried. I think this is one of the key mistakes alot
of guys make when they get into the community,
they focus on too much theory and less
practice, you can go blue in the face
and read 20 books on attraction
but it's no good unless you
actually get out there
and put what you've
learnt to the test!
Take it from me man,
pick an instructor you can
relate to or just like better,
stick with their method
and see how you progress from there.
If all else fails, pick another method and try again.

It's good to see you've decided to do something
about your AA and just by reading how many
girls you had to talk to/approach, whatever,
you already setting yourself up for failure.
30 Girls on the first try in the field? Fuck
man now that's a lot of ass to be chasing
on you're first try and all the while with your
AA still inside. I agree with the trivial question opener
of asking what the time is, but that's just too trivial for my taste
and frankly that's just a bad opener, not to mention boring and
mundane? "Do you know what the time is?" Dude, it's the year 2011,
you mean to tell me you're the kind of guy who doesn't carry an iPad
or cellphone on him? ;) Nah man, scrap that opener and never use it again.

Change the opener and use the same principle. What I do is I use
kino to start off my interactions by using the back of my
hand/fingers on the girls shoulder
so I can bring her to my direction softly yet they can feel that
someone is touching them without freaking out and that I'm just
using a slight gesture to bring them into my world
and I mean no harm...

After using kino I say "Excuse me, do you know which way the
Mugg&Bean (coffee shop) is? I feel like a lost
kid in this place!" There you go. Interesting, genuine and
harmless to the target. Also, did you use any kino while opening
any of the old geazers or did you just come up from behind, the
front, the side...? Last thing, don't even worry about those
people you approached before, realise your mistakes
and learn from them. That's what it's all about,
learn from your past and look to the future.

I'm gonna read up this Lucas guy to get an idea
of what you've been learning.

Baby steps brother, baby steps.
Author:  Bouncerr [ Mon Oct 03, 2011 6:46 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hey man,

Of course I'm not sure, cuz I haven't seen you approaching those women, but I think you were to insecure and self-conscious.
But if you felt more confident after doing that, you should do this again, but with an other opener like he said, cuz he got a point, so you gain more confidence But before you go ask the time, take a shower, do your hair as long as you like, till it looks good to you, use some of you favorite cologne, put on the clothes you like the most. Just make sure you feel good, and then go to a mirror, look at yourself and try to get rid of an insecure attitude, and try to get a positive, social, nice attitude. I mean like the way your smiling, looking, your position etc.:) Then try to keep that attitude, and approach some women :)

You haven't to be a whole other person, just be (or act) full of confidence, and be nice:)
Author:  smiler01 [ Mon Oct 03, 2011 7:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
I’m a new member, but I personally think that you did really well to make a move, put the books down and get out there into the real world! Give yourself a pat on the back for that.

A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.
Author:  Bulletproof123 [ Mon Oct 03, 2011 7:54 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hey guys thanks for the replies.

Yeah I agree with that it is a pretty bad and boring opener and that 30 women on the first day is tough. Demonic Confidence is a 21 day challenge similar to "The rules of the Game" but way more intense, you have to listen to the audio tracks just before you actually do the exercise (which is on the audio file). It was probably a bad idea to start with this stuff.

I did approach from the front while they were looking down but did no kino on them. Will be trying your technique next time. But I definitely need to change the opener, there is no point in using a boring opener it will only make them uninterested and makes me look boring. Probably why I got so many cold responses. I will be taking your advice and just stick to one method. And most importantly I have to keep approaching girls because there is no other way to learn this stuff. I've learnt more from today than the last 2 months of reading material.

@bouncerr
Yeah a was pretty insecure and self-conscious due to the fact that I've never approached a women in my life. I've never had a girlfriend or even kissed a girl. I did however get offers in the past from extremely good looking girls and I have been told that I am pretty good looking (not boasting). I've always been clean, smelled nice, have a nice haircut that fits me and I always wear stylish clothes. I have started working out 4 months ago and I'm starting to look pretty muscular (again not boasting).

Anyways, Thanks guys for your advice, it really helped me.
Author:  Chai [ Mon Oct 03, 2011 8:44 pm ]
Post subject: 
I'll be keeping tabs on this post to see how you progress,
it's always nice to help out the newbies entering the
forum. I personally fuckin dig Adam Lyon's
techniques, check him out man
you wont regret it.
I haven't ;)
Author:  Snep [ Tue Oct 04, 2011 2:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hey there,
Im new to the pick up community too and started exactly the same mission yesterday. I went to the city center and randomly asked people for the direction to some streets I knew that were nearby. I approached like 10 people, it was hard to start, but after it gets easier, becouse once you are succesful it makes it easier to do the same thing again. I want to keep on doing this every day for this week.

I found this kind of guide to start: bosproject dot com(It doesnt allow me to share Url somehow) I really like it for what I have read so far.

I have also seen couple videos by Adam Lyons and it also made huge impression on me. I have seen his speach from 21 convention and I was like this must be the coolest guy on this planet... :-D

I will check this post again to see your progress and I will try to keep up:-) It should motivate me that there are guys all over the world going through the same stuff like me right now :)

Good luck with approaches Im going out too and I will try at least 20 today :)
Author:  Brysti [ Tue Oct 04, 2011 7:02 pm ]
Post subject: 
Next step: keeping eye contact with a girl in a bus or train until she looks away ;)
Is harder than it sounds, if you aren't allowed to break eye contact before her
Author:  Hank Moody [ Tue Oct 04, 2011 7:27 pm ]
Post subject: 
hey dude, read your post.

i did exactly the same thing, asked girls for the time on my first outing. i managed 1 girl in 4 hours.

dont give up.

the nly thing i would say is DO NOT grab a girl from behind. EVEN SOFTLY. this may work for that dude. but seriously your gonna get smacked.


if your gonna approach from behind, make sure u are slightly in front of them so they can see u in the corner of their eye. then do what that dude said. if u go in behind them there gonna be shook up. if you find asking for the time from the front hard then your gonna find an angry/scared girl much harder..

good luck and dont quit. why not try the noobie challenge, its a bi more tame, and gets you into it more. also try and find a local lair. i know a few guys from the london lair there cool guys and im sure u can tag along with them to go sarging.

Hank
Author:  Chai [ Tue Oct 04, 2011 9:03 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
if your gonna approach from behind, make sure u are slightly in front of them so they can see u in the corner of their eye. then do what that dude said. if u go in behind them there gonna be shook up. if you find asking for the time from the front hard then your gonna find an angry/scared girl much harder..
That dude was me haha. Yeah guys, don't put too much pressure
on yourselves to go an approach like 20 or fucking 30 girls
on the first try, you're just putting yourself under alot
of pressure and that doesn't benefit anyone. If
you're just starting out, make it your goal
to talk to 5 girls every time you go out
with the intention of opening them.
Breathing also helps...Not like
UGH UGH UGH UGH UGH!!
Smooth and controlled
through the nose....
and out the mouth
for a few seconds, just to calm
yourself down and essentially just
to get relaxed and have fun.

When I first started out trying to get
over my AA (I still am but I have learnt
alot since then) it took me over an hour
to approach my first girl. Girls will never
scream at you or bite your head off, they
are human beings like the rest of us and if you
treat them with respect they give you the same back.
My personal quote is...If you do the shit right
you can never go wrong ;) Remember that.
Author:  Olivier [ Wed Oct 05, 2011 12:17 pm ]
Post subject: 
You are in college? Just do what I do....come in late one time you so can't sit next to your normal group of friends you sit next all the time. Go sit somewhere were there is space. Say hi when you sitdown. Ask her for a pen/sheet of paper whatever. When it's recess make a remark on the college you have just both attended. Me during neuropsychology class: Man, I had no idea all those neurons were firing in my head all this time that really gets you thinking huh? :p

She reacts or doesn't, it's always on of the 2 ;)
You grab your jacket, put your books back into your bag, give her her pencil back and say: Here's your pen back. I am going to sit the next half of class next to my friends. But you seem like an awesome person, what's your name? Exchange names, tell her you'll see her around.

Oh and one more thing, greet her every day you see her, after about 2 or 3 times, she'll get the feeling she knows you. Then strike up an opinion opener one time and you found yourself a new potential mate;)
Author:  Chai [ Wed Oct 05, 2011 4:16 pm ]
Post subject: 
That's not bad but I would make an opener at college like this :

When you see the girl in your class open with kino,
ask her opinion on what she thinks of the current
class (anything to break the ice), make a
comment about how you like her
fashion (how she stands out
from all the others in the
classroom) and then say
you need to learn so she mustn't
disturb you (say it in a playful way).
If you did everything right and she likes
you she will probably ask what your
name is sometime or
after the class.
And there you
go.
Author:  Bulletproof123 [ Wed Oct 05, 2011 10:11 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hey guys sorry for not posting anymore I've been really busy the last couple of days and can't go out before Friday.

@Snep Thanks for the guide, its really good!

@Brysti I always do that when I'm in the bus or in the tube but that doesn't really work in London, most people here avoid eye contact.

@Oliver I know almost everyone in my year group and have befriend allot of girls. I don't really have much trouble making friends with girls but I always end up in the friendzone because I had no clue on how to go further. And even though I now know how to take it a step further, I don't really want to. I'm not experienced enough and I'm too nervous to do anything. Thats the reason why I want to practice on strangers first. Because if I screw up with them at least no one will know about it. But thanks for your tip about greeting her a few times and then running an opinion opener.

@Chai Thanks man really appreciate your help you're tips are great!

Anyways, I will be going out again on Friday. This time I'm going to give myself a realistic goal.
My mission for Friday is going to be:
Ask only young women, about my age, for directions to the nearest starbucks/HMV/watever. I have only completed the mission once I've had 5 neutral/warm responses or 10 approaches total.
Bonus mission(only if I feel really confident):
Go approach 3 women and use direct opener and try having a conversation.

Things to remember:
1)ALWAYS SMILE! This might sound easy but I always forget to smile, which makes me look unfriendly. Probably why I scared one of the women last time.
2)Don't sound depressed/Insecure/or anything negative. Always sound and look confident.
3)If approaching from the front always walk in her line.
4)Always look confident. Walk straight, look right above the horizon and try to look friendly.

I will report back on Friday and tell you guys how it went.

P.S. Should I start a journal in the Field Report section?
Author:  Rockshow [ Thu Oct 06, 2011 4:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Good job
Good thing that you tried though! When I was in the army those were the kind of people we wanted among us. Not the ones who were naturally strong but whined about marching for a while, but rather the skinny guy who puked and crawled and still made it to the finishing line.
Anyway, Kudos to you, bro! Hang in there and you will see positive results sooner than you think. =)

Rockshow
Author:  Snep [ Thu Oct 06, 2011 7:16 pm ]
Post subject: 
Sounds like a challenge ! Im going out tommorow too, so I will try to make these same goals. Im not sure about the bonus mission becouse that seems pretty hard it is totally different level to ask directly, probably needs few more days of random asking for directions :) At least for me.

Good luck on Friday mate !
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